Australia v England: Ashes first Test, day two - live

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14th over: Australia 86-1 (Head 50, Labuschagne 10) Carse drifts onto the pads of Labuschagne and is clipped efficiently through midwicket for four. A short ball is dumped to the same area for three.

England have lost all control of the scoreboard; At this stage in the first innings Australia were 28 for 1.

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A 36-ball fifty for Travis Head

13th over: Australia 79-1 (Head 50, Labuschagne 3) Head whips Wood for a single to reach the most brilliant half-century: 36 balls, 3x4, 3x6. His 152 at the Gabba shaped the 2021-22 Ashes; this innings could have a similar impact. He is a giant of the modern game.

Wood’s rhythm isn’t quite right, with his pace around 88mph/142kph. England can’t afford to wait for him to find it.

“I think England got their processes messed up by Head opening,” says Phil Harrison. “They tried to apply their plans to him as a middle order player to him as an opener. With the new ball, you just bowl new ball line and length, whoever is batting. Head got in their head, basically.”

That’s what great players do. I thought England were pretty accurate in the first five overs, but once Head got going they panicked a bit.

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12th over: Australia 75-1 (Head 49, Labuschagne 0) The Weatherald wicket was the first ball that has really kicked from the pitch. Carse produces another to beat the new batter Labuschagne all ends up. In fact it was an even better delivery, a lifter that seamed extravagantly. “Wowsers!” says an open-mouthed Labuschagne to everyone and no one.

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WICKET! Australia 75-1 (Weatherald c Duckett b Carse 23)

It’s not the wicket England wanted but they’ll take it. Weatherald pulls Carse for four with a touch of contempt, tries again and is surprised by some extra bounce. He gets a top-edge onto the helmet and is easily caught by Duckett in the covers.

That’s the end of a mentally tough knock from Weatherald: 23 from 34 balls. He will feel like a Test player now.

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Updated at 03.16 EST

11th over: Australia 71-0 (Head 49, Weatherald 18) The pitch looks placid now, but that might be an illusion glimpsed the aftermath of another Travis Head boundary. He jumps across to fetch Wood over finr leg for six, then belts four more past backward point. In a very low-scoring game, Head has screeched to 49 from 35 balls. One of the greatest matchwinners of his generation has turned the match, maybe the series, in less than an hour.

“I fancied Australia to chase these when they started,” writes Phil Harrison. “But I didn’t think they were going to coast it. I know it’s only one game but this is going to feel crushing given the match situation at lunch.”

I’m trying to keep a level head, summon Kipling. What was it he said?

If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster

And treat those two impostors just the same;

Then you’ve never watched England play cricket

Have you, my son?

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10th over: Australia 58-0 (Head 38, Weatherald 18) Forget Travis Head’s Test average of 42. He Head is the most precious species in sport, a huge-game player, and it looks like he’s doing it again here. Head throws the kitchen sink at a full, wide delivery from Carse, slicing it high over the slips for six. There was a man on the boundary but it cleared him comfortably.

Carse’s first two overs have disappeared for 22.

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9th over: Australia 47-0 (Head 29, Weatherald 17) Archer off, Mark Wood on. Head jumps up to slap three through the covers, then Weatherald calmly steers a boundary past the slip cordon. Australia were too passive with the bat yesterday; this partnership has been a model of controlled aggression. England need a maiden, never mind a wicket, because this is getting away form them in a hurry.

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8th over: Australia 39-0 (Head 26, Weatherald 13) Brydon Carse, on for Gus Atkinson, is panelled for 11 in his first over. The second ball is short and follows Head, who bends his back to uppercut it over the keeper’s head. That’s a sensational shot, Australia’s first six of the match, and he follows up with a flamboyant thrash to the cover boundary.

The decision to open with Travis Head could win the match for Australia; he has raced to 26 from 25 balls.

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Updated at 02.53 EST

7th over: Australia 28-0 (Head 16, Weatherald 12) Archer overpitches to Head, who clumps him through mid-off for three. The bowlers aren’t getting much zip out of the pitch at the moment; it might be time for Brydon Carse to thump the bejesus out of a good length. Or maybe he could wait a few overs until the heavy roller wears off.

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Updated at 02.52 EST

6th over: Australia 22-0 (Head 11, Weatherald 11) Weatherald pulls Atkinson stylishly for three, an excellent shot to a ball that wasn’t particularly short. These are worrying times for England.

“For some reason the phrase RGD-W/8-43 is on my mind,” writes Paul Griffin. “What can it mean? Has the Aphex Twin recorded a Christmas single at last?”

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5th over: Australia 16-0 (Head 8, Weatherald 8) This is a fine start for Australia. If they can survive Archer’s first spell they will arguably be favourites.

“Lest we forget,” says Abhishek Chopra, “this is the best opening partnership of this match by quite the distance.”

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Updated at 02.41 EST

Weatherald is not out! He knew he hadn’t hit it. It was a cracking delivery that snaked back through the gate, but there was no inside edge.

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WICKET? Australia 15-1 (Weatherald c Smith Archer 7)

Weatherald works Archer through square leg for three to get off the mark in Test cricket. That was his 11th delivery of the innings, his 13th of the match, and the runs were greeted with extravagant cheers from the home fans.

His first boundary follows soon after, snicked all along the ground, but then he’s given out caught behind off a beauty from Archer. England are certain, so is the umpire, but Weatherald has reviewed it straight away.

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Updated at 02.51 EST

4th over: Australia 7-0 (Head 7, Weatherald 0) Head does go after Atkinson’s first ball, slamming a cut that is stopped at backward point by Carse. Atkinson’s over is largely excellent – tight line, good length – but when he drifts too full, Head puts him away to the midwicket boundary with a flourish. Australia have started well.

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3rd over: Australia 3-0 (Head 3, Weatherald 0) No fireworks yet from Travis Head, who has started watchfully against Archer. He might try to put pressure on Atkinson at the other end.

After Head takes a single, Weatherald tries to pull Archer and is hit on the arm. Weatherald takes the blow and smiles down the wicket; not sure whether that was at Archer or Head. But for a guy on a pair in a huge Ashes Test, Weatherald looks pretty calm. Calmer than you are.

“If either side manage to wrap this up today, could they not just play an extra Test on the spare days?” says Tim Woods. “They could probably even have a day off in between.”

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2nd over: Australia 2-0 (Head 2, Weatherald 0) Gus Atkinson starts around the wicket to the left-handed Jake Weatherald. No specialist batter has made a pair on Test debut for Australia, so Weatherland will be desperate to get off the mark. But Atkinson gives him nothing in the first over and he sensibly plays out a maiden.

“I’ve been out for a few drinks (Illinois time) and settled down to watch the cricket before bed,” writes Martin Widdicks. “I think I saw a fifty partnership for the eighth wicket in what seemed like five overs, and then someone out caught from a shot played a yard outside off stump. I guess I’m more drunk than I thought.”

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1st over: Australia 2-0 (Head 2, Weatherald 0) Jofra Archer starts with a quiet over to Head. There were a couple of balls down the leg side, possibly deliberate, and a beauty that seamed past the edge. Head flicked the last ball for two to get Australia up and running. They need to make the highest score of the match to win, but they’re batting on a day-two pitch so that isn’t as tough as it sounds.

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England batted for 67.3 overs in the entire match, their shortest total in an Ashes Test (where they lost all 20 wickets) since 1888.

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Are you sitting comfortably? Well I’m afraid that won’t do. Find an uncomfortable spot and settle down for the Australian run-chase. As if things weren’t exciting enough, Travis Head, the original Bazballer, is opening the batting. He could seize the initiative in half an hour.

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Updated at 02.17 EST

“Hi Rob,” writes Clive Darwell. “If anyone’s after some action in which the contestants have steeled themselves over months of preparation and perform with utmost application, the world coin-tossing championships are on Eurosport.”

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Usman Khawaja will not open in the second innings. He left the field again with a back spasm during the England innings. Sir Alastair Cook, talking on TNT Sports, reckons it’s “a 50/50 game”. And in a statement of the offensively obvious, I’d like to place on record that Steve Smith and Travis Head are the key men.

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“I’ve been a big fan of ‘Bazball’, but like so many other intoxicating things in life, it should be practiced in a judicious manner,” says Manjinder Sidhu.. “Everything in moderation and all that.

“England’s second innings is alarmingly similar to when my five-year-old nephew finds a few a few too many Freddos going spare and inevitably becomes too excited to think properly. Australia haven’t even bowled that well. I’m concerned…”

Do life’s most intoxicating things really need to be practiced in a judicious manner? It’s a good question, and I’ll get back to you when I’ve finished the secret stash of Freddos.

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Tea: Australia need 205 to win

Mitchell Starc leads Australia off after an immense performance. He took 3 for 55 in the innings, 10 for 113 in the match, but that three-for doesn’t tell the full story of a terrific spell that included the key wickets of Joe Root and Ben Stokes.

A word too for Scott Boland, who got back on the Bazball horse, the one that keeps dismounting him, and bowled quite beautifully to take 4 for 33.

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Updated at 02.00 EST

WICKET! England 164 all out (Atkinson c Doggett b Boland 37)

Gus Atkinson plonks his front foot down and sweep/ramps Scott Boland to fine leg, where Doggett takes a well-judged running catch.

I have no idea what has just happened, or what we are watching, or who is going to win. But I can tell you that the players are going to take tea.

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Updated at 02.02 EST

34th over: England 164-9 (Atkinson 37, Wood 4) Mark Wood, on a king pair, heaves his first ball to cow corner for four. And why the hell not.

“Seeing a lot of doomy world views from English fans today - I’d traditionally be one of them,” writes Robin from Stockport. “But really, whatever happens here there are frailties on show from both teams - whoever walks away one down will feel like one got away, but very much up for another crack on 4 Deecmber. That’s the makings of a classic series right there for me. I’ll keep getting up early until it isn’t!”

I agree with you. I think. But given the position England were in at lunch, this would be a pretty devastating defeat.

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WICKET! England 160-9 (Archer c Smith b Doggett 5)

Jofra Archer lasts three balls: a single, a thump to the cover boundary and a top-edged pull that is expertly caught on the run by Steve Smith. England lead by exactly 200.

Oh, and 29 wickets have fallen in less than 113 overs. Out there what is going off I just don’t know.

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Updated at 02.01 EST

Despite the ugly end, that was a fine cameo from Carse, 20 from as many deliveries. Funny old game, cricket; in this innings Carse has scored twice as many as Root, Brook and Stokes combined.

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WICKET! England 154-8 (Carse c Carey b Doggett 20)

One for the purists, this. Brydon Carse runs well outside off stump, tries to ramp Doggett and gets a thin tickle through to Carey. By the time Carse made contact with the ball he was standing on about 15th stump.

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Updated at 01.52 EST

33rd over: England 154-7 (Atkinson 36, Carse 20) Atkinson gets inside the line to hook Starc very fine for six. Starc then stops in his delivery stride and looks accusingly at the non-striker Carse, although replays suggest Carse hadn’t backed up too far. Carse has a word with Starc - possibly two, the first one beginning with the sixth letter of the alphabet.

Talking of six, Atkinson has just pulled another over the head of the man at long leg. That’s the fourth sixth of this partnership; before that there was only one in the match. This is rapidly, very rapidly, turning into a game-changing stand: a pair of twos bring up the fifty partnership in just 34 balls.

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Updated at 01.48 EST

32nd over: England 138-7 (Atkinson 20, Carse 20) One thing in England’s favour is that their bowlers will get some overnight rest during Australia’s run-chase; that could be vital.

This partnership is certainly vital. Doggett, on for Boland, drags his first ball down and is put away for four by Atkinson. Carse then pulls just short of midwicket. He and Atkinson have added 34 in 29 balls.

“Is it just me or is there really a bit of Harold Larwood about Brydon Carse?” writes Abhishek Chopra. “Strong lad, bustling batter, energetic pacer specialising in short-pitched bowling. England would love 98 runs off his bat at this stage.”

I can’t picture Larwood bowling, so not sure about their actions, but I like the comparison of their roles in the team. Both spiky and fearless as well.

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31st over: England 131-7 (Atkinson 12, Carse 19) Atkinson slashes Starc behind square for three, though it would have been four but for the outfield. Carse does find the boundary with a lovely thump through the covers. He is such a valuable cricketer: he’s taken three wickets, three catches and is now scoring some very handy runs.

“Maybe the long DRS check,” begins my colleague Luke McLaughlin, “was to desperately try and get some day-three ticket revenue.”

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30th over: England 122-7 (Atkinson 9, Carse 15) Scott Boland returns to the attack. I’m slightly in awe of the mental strength and skill he has shown today, because it would have been easy to surrender to self-doubt after the pummelling he suffered on day one.

Carse takes us back in time, all the way to yesterday afternoon, by charging Boland and haddocking six down the ground. Shot! And useful runs, for England now lead by 162.

“Waking up to an England Ashes collapse is a staple,” writes Felix Wood. “I went for a bit of a twist today – watched until lunch and then drifted back to sleep until ten minutes ago, to be greeted by England’s latest heroic crusade to counter those saying cricket has become too much of a batsman’s game. This series has the feel of humiliation all over it already.”

That’s the spirit!

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29th over: England 114-7 (Atkinson 8, Carse 8) Carse fences at Starc and is beaten. Australia have always been so good at detonating the lower order in their own conditions, even when Nos 8-11 can bat a bit. Atkinson has a Test hundred, a spectacular one at that, and Carse has made two in first-class cricket.

“Slightly conflicted about that DRS call there – I think he did hit it so maybe you just say the right decision reached in the end, no great harm done, but was that really enough evidence to overturn a not out decision (especially when a similar one went the other way yesterday)?” says Will Vignoles. “Maybe it’s just my England bias clinging desperately to a last shred of hope in a horrific session but that feels a bit unsatisfying.”

Tricky, isn’t it? I’m confident he hit it, mainly because he started walking off, but you could certainly argue the evidence was insufficient. The spike on Snicko was slightly bigger than Labuschagne’s yesterday. In the grand scheme, I think it’s a minor controversy at worst.

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28th over: England 112-7 (Atkinson 7, Carse 7) Smith started to walk off the field when Australia reviewed his decision, then hung around just in case. I’d be confident he hit it, but England could reasonably argue that the evidence is not conclusive if it takes the third umpire five minutes to overturn the decision. Either way, England have lost six wickets for 39 runs in a dramatic post-lunch collapse.

They’re going to keep swinging regardless. The new batter Brydon Carse tries to pull Doggett and top-edges six over the keeper’s head.

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WICKET! England 104-7 (Smith c Carey b Doggett 15)

Jamie Smith is out! He flicked away from his body at a short delivery that bounced down the leg side and through to Alex Carey. There was a slight spike on RTS – a bit more than the murmur in the Marnus Labuschagne incident yesterday – and the third umpire eventually decided there was enough evidence to overturn the on-field decision.

‘Eventually’ is the operative word. Apparently it took over five minutes, and the TNT Sports commentators think the evidence was inconclusive.

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Updated at 01.48 EST

The third umpire is still checking. You can make a case both ways but my instinct is it should – and will – be given out. Either way, a controversy is brewing.

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Australia review for caught behind!

Alex Carey thinks he’s taken Smith down the leg side off Doggett. We’ll soon find out. Smith played away from his body so if there was a noise, I don’t know what else it could have been.

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Updated at 01.11 EST

27th over: England 104-6 (Smith 15, Atkinson 6) After Smith edges Starc over the slips for four, a bye brings up the England hundred. We’ve got another seven weeks of this, you know.

Atkinson misses a wild slap, digs out a terrific yorker and then clips a poor delivery over backward square leg for four. That’s a nice, controlled stroke. Until that point he looked like he was trying to hit every ball into the year 2027.

Usman Khawaja is wincing his way off the field, presumably with another back spasm. The poor guy has had a miserable Test.

England lead by 144.

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Thanks Geoff, hello everyone. I’ll see Steven Pye’s Melbourne 1990 and raise him Brisbane 1990, the first Test of the “fart competing with thunder” series.

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Geoff Lemon

26th over: England 95-6 (Smith 11, Atkinson 2) J Smith is happy to give Atkinson strike first ball, pulling Doggett. Atkinson plays a shot a ball, misses most of them, and finally scores two from the last ball before drinks.

“Starting to get horrible Melbourne 1990 vibes about this match,” writes Steven Pye. “To be honest, I’ve never really got over that second innings collapse, so this effort after lunch is not helping.”

Meanwhile, Paul Harrison is following from Brooklyn. “Tell me: does Win-Viz or whatever the heck it was called still exist? If so, what is it saying? And how does that compare to the ol’ Geoff Lemon gut in terms of what could transpire over the next three days... er, hours?”

I don’t think we’re getting to day three, at this rate… if England complete this collapse, Australia could win today. But if England have 180 to bowl at they might yet be competitive. Plenty of pace still in the pitch, an opposition hopped up on adrenaline, and England’s give fast bowlers will be fresh.

Anyway, that’s me out, and I’ll leave you to memories of 1990 from Rob Smyth.

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Updated at 01.18 EST

25th over: England 92-6 (Smith 10, Atkinson 0) With all that carnage happening, Atkinson walks out and plays a horrible shot, booming a drive at his first ball and missing it completely. Starc finishes the over with one that strays down leg, clipping the pad on the way for four byes.

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WICKET! Stokes c Smith b Starc 2, England 88-6

The change of ends works! Everything is working for Australia now. The England captain is gone, the man who could have marshalled a rearguard, and it’s not due to a bad shot, it’s another belter of a delivery. Some angle in, some movement away, a hard length that gets up high on the bat as Stokes tries to defend, and it rockets into Smith’s midsection at slip. Hands in the right spot, Australia’s stand-in skipper completes the removal of his counterpart, and Starc has 10 wickets in a Test match for the third time in his career.

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Updated at 01.48 EST

24th over: England 85-5 (Stokes 2, Smith 7) Not a bad over from Doggett, getting some movement. I think he’s come on to swing Starc around to the southern end…

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23rd over: England 83-5 (Stokes 1, Smith 6) The English singing in the stands is getting loud now, urging on their last recognised pair. Everyone is back in their seats, I can only see a few hundred empties in the very back rows of the top deck. Boland has the ball on a string now, nibbling off the pitch outward and inward, working over Smith. Beats the edge, cuts back in to smack the pad, too high. Maiden, his second. This is why they pick Boland, you England followers who keep saying he’s no good on the basis of the two games you’ve seen him play.

“Hello darkness my old friend,” emails Will Vignole, “from a dark and rainy north west - this is all beginning to feel like the same grim old story from an England point of view. I’m a big defender of this team but this has been a pretty abject self-immolation - they made some improvements to their game sense over the last year but all of that seems to have gone out of the window. Australia’s batters don’t look much better but I know which dressing room I’d rather be in right now.”

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22nd over: England 83-5 (Stokes 1, Smith 6) Smith smokes it straight, Starc puts his shin in the way, and the ball ricochets to midwicket for a run. How does the wagon wheel draw that one? Stokes gets off the mark with a nudge through square.

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21st over: England 80-5 (Stokes 0, Smith 4) Boland to Smith, who is watchful against the stuff on a length, but pulls the one shorter ball for three runs.

Rightly or wrongly, dropped catches become emblematic for players near the end – think Brad Haddin dropping Joe Root at Cardiff in 2015, or Adam Gilchrist’s drop off Laxman that made Gilchrist think his time was done. That one for Khawaja has that kind of energy. He nearly dropped the first one off Crawley yesterday, then spent so much time off the field that the top order was turned upside down. Now this. It doesn’t look right.

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20th over: England 77-5 (Stokes 0, Smith 1) So it is Ben Stokes and Jamie Smith starting anew, together, both on nought, as Starc hunts the edge of Smith’s bat, beats it with the second ball, takes it with the third ball, and Usman Khawaja drops the catch. Low, dipping, near ankle height, but your first slip has to hold that, and he’s parried it into the ground to give Smith a first run.

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WICKET! Root b Starc 8, Australia 76-5

Goodness me! Starc comes back and lands the biggest fish. Or more accurately, the biggest fish swims up and leaps straight into his boat. There are no sharks to follow this old man through the sea and steal his prize. Just a conventional Starc left-arm delivery, fast and angled across a right-hander from over the wicket, on a length, and Root throws the hands like Brook did, like Crawley did, and chops it from the angled blade back onto his stumps. The roar around Perth Stadium! England have lost 4 for 9!

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Updated at 01.37 EST

WICKET! Brook c Khawaja b Boland 0, England 76-4

19th over: England 76-4 (Root 8) Oh, Harry. Yer not a wizard, not today. What sort of shot was that? Root and Brook, they’re the real quiz. They’re the engine room. But Brook walks out, faces too balls, then tries to smack Boland, on the up, to a ball that is tight on the line of off stump. He only succeeds in nicking it to first slip.

When Boland takes wickets, he does it in bursts, and now he has three in ten balls.

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WICKET! Pope c Carey b Boland 33, England 76-3

Pope throws his head back yelling in dismay, but that is the least throwing-your-head-back-worthy dismissal imaginable. After playing and missing about 43 times, he plays and edges, a huge drive once more at Boland, whose wider line tempts the shot, and I think that was deliberately bowled after having been tighter before that ball. Nick, caught behind.

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Updated at 01.40 EST

18th over: England 75-2 (Pope 33, Root 7) More Green, bowling from the Langer Stand end, mostly down the leg side. There’s one appeal for a catch, but no. When Root gets on strike, he smokes a pull for four.

“Waiting for my daughter’s five minute part in a three hour matinee of performances mostly comprised of pensioners Zumba classes. God bless the OBO.”

It strikes me, Eamonn Maloney, that parenting is just not worthwhile.

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17th over: England 67-2 (Pope 30, Root 2) A big reception from the England fans for Joe Root, who smartly gets off a pair first ball by tucking Boland through square for two runs. This is exactly the platform that Root can make the most of, leading by 105 as he comes to the crease.

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WICKET! Duckett c Smith b Boland 28, England 65-2

There is Boland’s first for the match! And just as well for Australia that they gave him the ball after the break. It’s a classic Boland dismissal, high bounce from a good length, getting Duckett propping forward and pushing, the edge going low to slip when Smith takes it smartly.

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Updated at 01.39 EST

16th over: England 64-1 (Duckett 28, Pope 29) Start the way you mean to go on? Ollie Pope plays a huge drive first ball of the over, and misses the lot once more. It’s Cameron Green with the ball to start this session, which is interesting. I would have thought Starc would have a burst after the break. Pope does latch onto his next attempt at a boundary, this time a shorter ball that he can hit squarer for four.

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Alright, lunch is done, and we’re about to get going once more.

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Lunch – England 59 for 1, lead by 99 runs

It was a scratchy session for England’s second pair, but it’s ultimately been successful. A lead of 99 is substantial with most of the batting yet to come. Australia need something in the next stanza from Doggett, who has been patchy today, and Boland, who has just started to find his rhythm.

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15th over: England 59-1 (Duckett 28, Pope 24) Now what in the Sam Hill was that? Duckett charges Boland like a man running for his bus, does a sudden turn back like a man realising he’s forgotten his umbrella, and in between times is smashed on the front elbow. He’s in a lot of pain, wanders off to square leg, waits for treatment, and there’s a lengthy delay as he gets seen to by the physio.

Finally gets back to take guard, final ball of the over, and Boland runs in and pins him lbw! The umpire gives it. Duckett reviews, because he’s jumping and it hits him above the knee roll, but he’s still short enough and playing far enough back for that to be clipping the bails… but it’s pitched outside leg! By a millimetre. Poor old Boland, thought he’d broken through, but not to be.

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Updated at 23.46 EST

Our reporter Ali Martin is lurking somewhere nearby at the ground, writing in.

“Speaking of AC/DC, I was part of the first ever crowd in this ground, a test event eight years ago that saw England Lions play Perth Scorchers. Memories include Mitchell Johnson looking pants-wettingly terrifying on a pitch that hadn’t remotely settled, Mark Wood somehow drilling him back over his head for one of the biggest sixes I have ever seen, and the ‘Thunderstruck’ light show at the change of innings. It’s not an amazing anecdote, granted.”

Cricket is full of not amazing anecdotes, Ali, but anything that involves Mark Wood hitting a dinger, I’ll listen to.

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